8 Halloween Costumes Any Crazy Mother Can MacGyver

I love Halloween. My two favorite things about it are scary movies and dressing up. However, since I've had kids it seems I spend so much time helping them  pick costumes, apply makeup and become the person or thing they choose, on the night of make believe, I have forgotten my love of dress up. 

A costume from 5th grade. Yes, that's a poodle on my skirt. 

I now put very little time and effort into my costume. Last year, I threw a Bruins shirt on, painted a mustache, tossed a hat on my head, a hand down my pants and went as a man...my man! While fun, it wasn't very inventive though it was quite embarrassing walking around the neighborhood with my kids as their father--at least until I'd had my second glass of wine. 

That's me in the middle dressed as a boy...my husband!

This year I wasn't going to let that happen. I decided that I would go out and buy a costume--something inventive, something different, something I could be proud of. So it was off to the store with the 2 and 4 year old instead of giving them naps. I picked up a blonde wig, not the one I'd hoped for, but one I could work with. Next was a clothing store to pick up the ugliest sweater I could find. I was going to be Bev Goldberg, Mother Smother extrodinare from my favorite ABC sitcom, The Goldbergs. I finally settled on not a sweater, but the most hideous Puma wind jacket I'd ever seen. It was glorious. 

That night I even wore my beautiful ensemble to the 4 year old's preschool party. Let's review some of the responses: 

Teacher: Oh look, you dressed up? (Expressed more in question than statement form). 

Teacher 2: Oh...

I told them who I was and still received blank stares. Later Teacher 3 whispered: I actually thought you were a prostitute. No, I nearly responded, though I did think of dressing the 4 year old up as one and calling her a prostiTOT....badabumching!!

Let's just say very few mothers spoke to or looked at me. Some were nice of course, but most seemed afraid and confused. All in all, it was a successful night because the 9 year old thought my costume was a hit as several parents were asking each other who I was. I didn't have the heart to explain the ugly politics of preschool gatherings, or to tell her their comments weren't because they appreciated my costume...

I also managed to post a picture of me all Beved out on Facebook and asked people who I was. There were several funny and ingenious responses including The Nanny's mom, Rod Stewart and Victoria Gotti. I have included some of them as a part of my costume ideas here. To create these costumes, few things were required--some props and: 

You can then, with a touch of magic,  and some simple props create several looks. The important thing is that you start out with a basic foundation outfit....black leggings and a black tank top work nicely and most moms have these. Since I had no helper, I had to take the pictures on my own and stand in front of a mirror to give you a full body. Yes, I'm kind of a loser...

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 If you zip the jacket and tuck the hair under you can be:

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Or you can let your hair down, grab your 4 year old's tiara and do this:

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Or pull off the tiara and trade in the sash for a knife....

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Or recall simpler times with sexy movie stars...

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Sometimes it's okay to be strange...

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Hitting the slopes and skiing sounds fun or at least drinking an Irish coffee while watching others ski does...

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And I've always wanted to be a 1950's housewife...ahhh, good to the last drop!!

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And, of course, if all else fails you can just stick with your original plan and go as this gal...the one and only Bev Goldberg!!

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If you've enjoyed this post please check out a past post about my dead rock star crush by clicking on the image below: