Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts

Snippets from Suburbia: Saturday Soccer & The Jesus Mug



**The second entry in the suburban snippets series, the factional (combination of fact and fiction) story of raising kids, marriage, suburbia, and parenthood. The series where we are reduced down to broad generalities--mother, father, eldest, youngest, cat and dog because that is, after all, what we become, at least to some extent. Isn’t it? 

Oh shit, the mother jumps out of bed. Maybe jumps is too strong a word, stumbles may be more accurate. “Let’s go,” she yells at the kids huddled together on the couch in various levels of dress as she enters the living room.The dog looks up at her for a moment, disinterested, and goes back to licking herself.

The Vag Gadge--Getting Personal with an FUD




I can't believe the things people come up with. Recently, after my rant about Period Panteez, a friend of mine tossed a gem my way. The Female Urination Device (FUD, yes FUD) or STP (stand-to-pee device, no I'm not making this shit up) offers ladies the ability to stand while peeing, or to piss like a guy.

FU, SKINNY JEANS! YOU’RE OUT.

They were everywhere for what felt like an eternity. They clothed the cool and fashionable mom at school drop off, the one who always seemed so together and had the impossible measurements of a Barbie doll. They looked equally as fabulous on the twenty-something who helped you pick them out, promising you’d be able to pull them off, too. She was wrong.

How the Fu*k Do We Potty Train Again?



Recently the two-year-old began potty training, a tricky endeavor that I've never seemed to master in my ten plus years of parenting. Each time I am faced with the idea of it I realize I have no damn clue. How the hell did I do this last time, I ask myself as I pull out the pink princess potty and rinse it off. 

8 Reasons It’s a Big Fucking No for the Volvo Car Seat of the Future




Volvo has just released a video and images of a new vehicle they are working on. It has a high concept infant car seat. I watched the video and realized there are several reasons why this Volvo is a big fucking no for me.

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